So you wanna read something funny? This is what I wrote at midnight the other night... I shouldn’t write at midnight. :)
The Art of the Wedding
Okay. You can say I’m putting too much thought into weddings these days…but the fact is, I’m in the wedding world. And while I have some problems with it, its still a beautiful place.
I’ve always tended to do things for love rather than money. However, that’s not always a solid business model, to say the least. And given this economy, its vice is outweighing its virtue. I confess I’ve even found myself tempted to sell out. Ideas of crossing over from Wedding World into The Wedding Industry have presented themselves in all kinds of well-dressed, self-preserving sheep’s clothing and I found myself having to step back and reassess from the ground up.
What is this wedding business all about, anyway? What’s with all the fuss…all the agonizing choices, all the months of planning…all the SPENDING? Are we (those of us in The Industry) just preying on all those rose-visioned souls who in their bliss, blind tradition and one-upping the Joneses are throwing inexplicable amounts of cash at an event that will last less than a day? (This is what the dark night [or fleeting moment as the case may be] of a wedding professional looks like, by the way.)
The answer is that yes, there are probably a few vultures out there wearing the hat of a wedding professional, but I am not one of them. Yes, I need to eat and I do believe my time, talent, education, and experience are worth compensation but that does not make me a vulture…it’s just one of the many signs that I am a human and a provider to my human little family.
So how then can I, in good conscience, be a supplier in the business of weddings? (For me, this feels like a harsh way to look at things but this is what you do in dark nights/moments.) And how can I be a good—not cutthroat—but Good businesswoman while still bringing Art to The Wedding?
[Queue the rising sun on the dark moment of night….]
(Musing) I feel like there is something to this growing trend of “personalizing” weddings… It feels really right. It’s just that it bothers me when people have a generic wedding. Not that is wrong…I just feel like they are missing an opportunity. It’s the McDonaldization of weddings. “I’ll have a no. 3 with the red roses, please…extra lace…no, wait, hold the lace.” Now, I like (certain) red (garden) roses and lace but it’s the thoughtlessness that bothers me.
This is the only time in history when this specific and unique person will join this other very unique and distinct person. I believe this is a sacred event…one that should be approached with utter joy, reverence, and yes, personality. This is no time for drive-through. Now, I’m not saying you have to spend a fortune but I can see how spending a fortune is also a valid and honorable option. The dollar amount, I believe should be, like everything else, a reflection on that couple’s personality. Are you cathedral or picnic in the park kind of people? Respect the traditions that are actually meaningful to you and let the rest be your own creation. Let your wedding be the best expression of you possible! This is the only time there can be a wedding like yours.
And another thing…. There is something really good about what can happen at a wedding. Loved ones gather to support the love between two people…that’s already a lot of good right there. But there’s also the benefit of a party…celebration and the opportunity to indulge to whatever extent in the experience. A time to turn off cell phones and schedules…forget about time and just be present. Tasting goodness. This often happens at weddings on its own but I do believe the experience can be heightened (and achieved with less stress) when professionals enter the scene. We can bring all our gifts to bear in creating, documenting, and remembering that moment.
[its very sun-shiny now…] Answer! The Wedding is an inherently beautiful event and it is only natural that individuals would seek artists to add to that beauty…and subsequently pay them because they value the input! Win-win. :)
