i met melissa duke 20 years ago in murfreesboro, tn at a place called mainstreet. it was, at the time, THE place to play live music in that area and i was the regular wednesday night entertainment... duke was a server/singer/bohemian and even if she was simply bringing you another beer, there was that smile and the glint in those eyes... you REMEMBERED her... and this little sprite knew more about indy music than i did... we were destined to be friends... after a gig we would sit around talking motorcycles with the bartenders, theatre with john lennon (the other one) or watch a meteor shower and discuss our latest favourite band or a recent tumultuous relationship...

then she was moving to LA... big plans, a little trepidation, but GOING... we sat around the night before she left talking about the FUTURE... then she was gone

we met up in new orleans a couple times... once for mardi gras and i became part of the family... hell i was invited to grillades & grits brunch on fat tuesday morning by the mcintyres... that is IN!

and i visited her a couple times in LA where she was adapting to the LAlien-ness of it pretty well... the sushi was different, there was loads of traffic but she had COOL friends... she showed me the hollywood sign up close, universal studios, venice beach... it was fun and duke was doing ok.... then she met this knight-in-shining-armor rockabilly guitar slinger named neil and suddenly she was happy... i mean HAPPY

the smile was back, the joyful laugh... all back...neil rocked... then there was a band, burlesque, a house on a hill with a view and a hot tub and finally a RING

the wedding in columbia, tennessee was a blast... all these west coasters staring at all the green trees and grass wondering how we irrigated it all while all the locals wondered where they found clothes like that and if their hair looked that way intentionally... what a party!!!!!!

then the mooneys decided the west coast was too far from home/family and not the place to raise a family of their own... moving again...

after a bit, duke and mooney ended up living less than 5 miles from our house and i am sad to say that we probably saw each other more when we lived all those states apart... lives progress, families grow, responsibility increases... we stayed in touch... i read neil’s “leaves of grass” online... i saw photos of the kids online... i was part of the “burn this” club (duke’s foray into “Rock Steady” was enlightening to say the least)... they came to a picking party or two... but i was always gigging on the weekends so i would miss the birthday parties and their gigs at the family wash... we DID have that great birthday dinner a couple years ago... just neil, melissa, kristie and me... a GREAT night... and we vowed to do it more often... melissa showed up at the picking party by herself that year because the kids were sick... and she sang her ass off... this past september we saw each other in the lobby of the ryman before the squeeze concert... we were all happy and excited... both about seeing each other and the concert just moments away... and again we vowed to spend more time.. but i was out of town gigging for the “come as your favourite album cover” birthday party last month... in fact i even forgot to call... then last wednesday i went to see some friends play at grimey’s and bought the latest blue runners CD because duke loved them so much... and now she will never know

its been less than 24 hours and already there is this HUGE hole in my world... i cannot imagine what neil and the girls, matthew, marcy, delores and her entire family are going through.. i do know that i don’t tell a lot of people that i love them... but i said it to duke and her family as often as i could... and i will always miss her... she was one of the “good ones”...  vibrant, enthusiastic, loyal... and gone much too soon

you will be missed

sleep with angels dear friend

midnight 2/19/09