Monday, April 13, 2009
Easter
Lauren and Sabrina,
Today you were rejected by someone you loved and admired. And it hurts. 2000 years ago Jesus was deserted in his darkest hour by those he loved the most. And it hurt.
Someday, like Jesus, you may be asked to give up part of your life for someone else. And, like Jesus, it will hurt. And, like Jesus, you will fight against it. You may cry out “Lord, take this cup from me!” And, although you will know the sacrificial love is the most important type of love, you may not even like it. Jesus didn’t smile through his crucifixion. He did not smile as the soldiers spit on him and mocked him. I suspect he didn’t like it much.
I was not smiling at the end of my marathon. I did not smile during childbirth...although there was that epidural :) I did not smile when I woke up in the middle of the night to feed you again and rock you and walk with you around and around the house. And I didn’t always smile as I watched Daddy leave the house to further his career while I stayed home to feed you and change your diaper and hold you...
But Jesus did smile when he arose and saw Peter’s face. He smiled when he told Peter “Feed my sheep.” Remember this is the Peter that rejected him just a few night before. He smiled knowing that his sacrifice would allow Peter to change the world. He smiled because his love can overcome the rejection of this world and take this broken man (or even me) and create from brokenness a movement.
And I smile when I look at you. I know that the sacrifice of motherhood is worth every sleepless night and every sacrificed research paper. My suffering pales in comparison to Jesus’ suffering and yet I can see how much sacrifice is worth the pain. (not that I am ready for a third round of suffering...come on, now, I am not that crazy!) I see that the love of a parent can take a broken soul, a hurting soul, even that of a 3 or 5 year old, and create from that brokenness a movement and a future because we have Jesus as our model.
