Fork & Heel
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Whilst an enraged Jonty Climpson thundered about Shardeloes looking for Butler Smith, Odham MacGuinness stared at the newspaper Climpson had thrust into his hands. It contained the first reports of the incident in the Hot House, prior to the conflagration in Forest Hill. Climpson had thickly underlined a part of the article which contained an eyewitness account of ‘a man naked as a jay, who materialised from thin air, whilst a white liquid pooled at his feet’. O.M ran after Climpson who was rushing from room to room, leaving a small trail of destruction in his wake. Between throwing open cupboards and peering under tables, Climpson told O.M what he was convinced must had happened...
When the three of them had returned to Climpson’s laboratory, prior to their hurried departure from Kings Lynn, Butler Smith had somehow secreted away some of Climpsons special gypsum; ‘MY bloody gypsum, the thieving git’.
Since their return to the capital, Butler Smith had been using the gypsum as a means of allowing him to carry out acts of lowly grubbiness and unspeakable sordidness that he would otherwise have been incapable of getting away with.
As bewildered and stunned as he was, Odham MacGuinness’ gut instinct told him that Climpson was right; not only did it explain why Butler Smith had been strangely cheerful on the train returning from Kings Lynn, but also accounted for why he hadn’t been sighted around Shardeloes for some days. When Climpson started searching the chalet where Butler Smith had been staying, he found what he had been looking for; traces of gypsum on Butler Smiths bed sheets. Climpson looked at O.M, vindicated. O.M, ever the Devils advocate, claimed that the stains weren’t conclusive proof of Butler Smith’s guilt; he pointed out his guest’s bed sheets were regularly covered with all matter of stains; the ones Climpson now stood over proved nothing...But when Climpson wet his finger and rubbed it on the stain, O.M had no choice but to accept his friends guilt: the top of Climpson’s finger had become invisible.
As the enormity of Butler Smith’s deceit began to dawn on him, O.M did the only thing one could do in such a situation.
He offered Climpson a cup of tea.
Butler Smith’s Deceit Discovered
21. The Stained Sheet