Chapter 3

On Thursday 16th November 1900 Odham MacGuinness removed, dusted and immortalised in prose the final brick from the old Roman wall at Buckthorney. The very next day a telegram was sent to Jerome Tharp & Sons in North Deptford which read ‘Am now ready for delivery . Tharp. Ps Hows your toe?.’

Jerome ‘Nobby’ Tharp was a master carpenter whose fine work Odham MacGuinness regarded as being second to none. In nearly all of Odham MacGuinness’ landscapes, the work of Tharp has featured in one aspect or another. The Doodling Door at Mountbank, Narkins Stairwell at Faversham and most notably The Gnarly Old Knob at Shortlands, all were lovingly crafted by Tharp. For this project however Tharp had outdone himself.

The following Monday at dawn a horse and cart drew up outside the old Gable at Buckthorney and four young men watched over by Tahrp and Odham MacGuinness, staggered under the weight of a large mysterious object wrapped tight in burlap and lashed with rope which they pulled from the cart and edged towards the site of the old wall. Once there the object was rested against one of the columns of bricks and urinated on by ‘Nod’ and ‘Nobby’. There then followed a bizarre ceremony which involved Odham MacGuinness being piggy backed around the garden by a naked Tharp and mud being hurled at a neighbours washing. This orgy of the ridiculous culminated with Odham MacGuinness leading a solemn procession back to the cart carrying several rose bushes which had all been baptised Nigel Swanscott.