38 VERNON FIDDLER

Vernon Fiddler (forward): Acquired Summer 2007 from the Nashville Predators

While it is doubtful that the Cows will be able to match the Predators multi-year, Million plus dollar offer for Vern the Cows are doing their best to entice him away.

He proved to be well worth the over $50 dollars that the cows invested in his game jersey racking up a goal and several assists in his first outing. GAME SUMMARY

Stay tuned to see if Vern bites on the Cows alleged counter offer of a case of Labatt’s and a second jersey to round out the season, or if he will honor his contract with the predators.

In yet another stunning move by the Nashville Mad Cows Vernon Fiddler has been re-signed... as goalie. While there can be no doubt that Fiddler is a world class athlete and the Cows should and did jump at the chance to sign him, why he is at goalie instead of forward seems a mystery. Sources close to the Cows say that it was on his list of demands which is rumored to be include a cold Canadien beer available at his command (“beer me bitch”), his own private parking spot, dibs on showering with Scovill after the games and allegedly he is be referred to as “your majesty” at all times. OK, some of those requests are a bit disconcerting, but all do-able. Still, further questions have to arise now that the Cows have signed Dan Ellis, one of the best Goalies in the world. It seems incredible that Fiddler won’t let relinquish on his “lord all-mighty of the goal” clause and let Ellis in net. But that seems to be the case. Somehow in this crazy league it seems to be working though as Ellis netted a hat trick in his first outing wearing the horns, and Fiddler managed to stop just enough rubber to let the cows scrape by 6-5.

Stay tuned for more as the drama unfolds.

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