Mindy Woodhead
 
 
 
I am trying to reach out and find women in my community. This is difficult because they rarely leave their homes. I still ride my bike once or twice a week to the village where I was staying with a family for December and January, but I live in the town about 15k away now, so it is an entirely different community. The men that I have most contact with are storeowners. The ‘home goods’ guy, the ‘veggie man’, ‘Mr. chicken’, and my ‘tp, milk, condiments and spices’ guy. They are all concerned that I live alone, though I avoid this line of discussion if I can help it; whether it is a come-on or genuine consternation is case by case. Sometimes I get invited to lunch, which again can be a shady paradigm. At first I responded to all such offers with the culturally agreed procrastination ‘God willing.’ After the third time I was invited by the ‘home-goods’ storeowner, I asked who would be at lunch. It was all women; his mother, sisters, nieces and aunts. So I cautiously decided to take him up on his offer and meet his family for lunch the next week. I got nervous heading over to the store to meet him, though. I had an unpleasant encounter with one of the other men in town just the day before. A nice guy turned mean when I refused his suggestions at advancing our acquaintance. Verbally mean, not physically, I will be VERY careful not to be in any physical scenario of that nature. Such tensions are bound to arise being a woman alone in this society. It’s a tough society to pull of lone-female development work, and many women quit their service in Morocco for that reason. More than the Muslim/Secular thing, or an Arab/America thing, the gender issues in Morocco are constantly in the forefront of every single encounter you have with everyone. On this day, I was heading to a store in order to follow a man to his house; I got nervous. I didn’t look him in the eyes when I got to his store, which is a very difficult exercise for me but one that seems pretty important to abide by. I was a little antsy and not real engaging as he closed his shop for lunch. I double-checked that we would be eating with women, and made a rough transition along the way in an attempt to convey that I am engaged in the states and getting married as soon as I return. He chuckled and told me he too was engaged, and would be getting married as soon as she turns 18, as that is now the law. Entering into the front door of his house, I could see we had to walk down a dark alleyway and I got my ‘spidey sense’ geared up, ready to physically defend myself if this was a trap. As the hallway made way to the light, I was immediately set at ease by a courtyard full of strong, funny women waiting to meet me. They greeted me warmly and talked and laughed throughout the next few hours. It was a wonderful lunch, followed by fruit, and then tea. I walked with the nieces on their way back to school. The girls knew exactly where I lived. Their high school is on that side of town, and evidently everyone is well aware of where I live. So this week can be chocked up to one bad experience and one good when it comes to reaching out to the community. I will continue to tread lightly and make case by case assessments on the offers put forth by the only community members I encounter – men.
Consumerism
Sunday, February 10, 2008