No one would recognize us on Hollywood Boulevard or in the new uppity “it” restaurant... but in our own little world Kevin and I somehow reach celebrity status when we are out with the twins.  At first, I’ll admit... i loooooved the attention.  I loved everyone gawking at my beautiful children and telling me what I already knew... how beautiful they are. But still... six months later... it is quite pestering that Kevin and I can’t even get through a meal or walk through a store without answering a barrage of questions... the conversation usually goes something like this... (and to finish setting the scene, Kevin and I are probably sitting at a table at Panera, or somewhere similar with one hand holding a sandwich to our mouths, and the other hand rattling some toy to entertain the babies, or rocking the carrier to try to lull them to sleep):

“Are they twins?” ... Yes.  

“Two boys, two girls?”... no, one of each.  (Their blue and pink outfits apparently do not give this away at first glance?)

“Are they identical?”.... what?!?!?! I just said they were a boy and a girl.  Last time I checked they didn’t have identical “parts” if you know what I mean.  (ok, I don’t actually mock people so blatantly, I actually just try to ignore this question.)

“Did you know you were having twins?” Yes... if the ultrasound didn’t give it away, the ridiculous size of my belly would have.

“Are they double trouble”... ok... this is my favorite question... mainly because it’s so unbelievably corny.  I also just try to ignore this one altogether.

“Whew, I’m glad it’s not me!” - Whew... i’m glad it’s not you either, lady, with an attitude like THAT! (again... that one is more said in my head than out loud.)  

and last but not least “Is it hard?”.  Wow. You tell me.  I’m pretty sure I look like I haven’t showered in a few days.  I can’t even eat my sandwich with two hands because I have to have one free to entertain or rock a baby.  Oh, and could you go get me a refill of Sweet Tea, please? But regardless of how hard it is... we love them both so much. And we feel honored that God picked us to handle two at a time.  (Although, however blessed we feel most days, there are a few days when I question God’s choice in picking us.)  

 

Something that is equally uncomfortable is having people talk about how “great” I look... when I really haven’t made any effort to get back in shape - aside from opening up the booby buffet four times a day.  (Actually, I really LIKE the compliments, it’s just the part that  follows that makes me really uncomfortable).  Kevin and I will be 5 questions into another “red carpet interview” and someone will ask “how I did it”.  I wish I could take credit for the rapid return of my girlish figure... but I can’t take any credit at all.  I would actually feel better saying something like “it’s been really hard, and we have a personal trainer come to the house three times a week.”  But I can’t say that... and honestly, that makes me feel really guilty for some reason.  Nursing twins requires about an extra 1000 calories every day, so, the babies get all the credit.  And although last week I managed to weigh less than before I got pregnant,  I still have this “skin issue” on my belly that is going away a little too slowly for my liking.  Two babies will really stretch out some skin (and I even managed to avoid any obvious stretchmarks.)  Ok, back to what I was saying.  The “uncomfortable” part comes after people are “amazed” that I’m fitting into my old clothes and then make a comment like “wow... I had my baby 11 years ago and I still haven’t lost the baby weight” - or - “It must be nice, I still look like I’m pregnant”.  I’m really not sure what to say to these people.  “Why yes... yes you do still look like you’re pregnant.” I don’t think that is the appropriate response.  Kevin and I have even talked about this at home, because neither of us know what to say, and it always makes us feel so awkward.  We just laugh uncomfortably in the hopes that the person thought they were making a funny comment that would elicit laughter.  And because I’m not a total idiot and realize that it is usually pretty hard to lose baby weight, and because perhaps I am an exception to the rule, I try to reinforce the fact that nursing two babies “really takes it out of you”.  I don’t care if people want to keep their “baby weight” for the rest of their lives.  I have no prejudice to that.  It doesn’t at all make me feel superior... it just makes me feel AWKWARD.  

 

So, to sum it up... I seriously can not remember the number of times Kevin and I have been sitting in a restaurant having a conversation with each other - and I’ll catch someone out of the corner of my eye standing literally right over my shoulder.  But perhaps I’m looking at this all wrong.  I know that these people aren’t trying to bug the living daylights out of me, their hearts and intentions are in the right place, and it could be that they realize we have twins (and can obviously tell that I haven’t showered in a few days) so they feel it’s their job to boost our confidence, so we don’t jump off a ledge or something.  In which case... I’m grateful to those people.  I love talking about my babies, and I love to show them to the world.  But seriously... must you stand over me and ask me questions while I have a mouth full of food??? A nice smile and head nod would do just fine.  And that guy standing over there in the bushes... is he taking pictures of us???