potpourri
MUST... FINISH... AVAST...
I bought zippers today.
Joann Fabrics sells zippers in every color of the rainbow, so despite the tiny bobbin of Avast yarn I brought with me, I couldn’t decide which color would look best.
So I bought six zippers.
Six.
What the hell am I going to do with five extra zippers?
The sane among us might suggest returning the zippers.
Me? I want to save them. Then, on April Fools Day, I’m going to cut five pairs of my husband’s underwear up the front and sew zippers into them. Then I’ll fold them back up and put them back in the underwear drawer. Then I’m going to take several old pairs of my jeans and cut the zippers out and put them back in the jeans drawer. Then, when my husband looks at me blankly, holding his new zip-fly boxers, I’ll rummage through the jeans, pull out the zipper-less ones and say, “I think the zippers like your crotch better than mine.”
Because here in Mongreltopia we are starving for entertainment.
POINTY THINGS
I also bought a tiny sewing machine today from Target for $20 (not bad, eh?). I have absolutely no idea how to sew. I have a vague idea that it involves needles. Maybe thread. And bleeding thumbs. I’m planning to plug the sucker in, stick some old gauge swatches into it for practice and step on that pedal - and here’s hoping I don’t sew my right hand to my left one.
BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEER-HOLDER
A recent post found The Panopticon waxing poetic about a hierarchy of art that some critics have tried to implement. For instance, an oil painting of an historical scene would be rated higher on the scale than a watercolor painting of some landscape. You can read his take on it, but I just wanted to mention it here because it scares the hell out of me.
Oh sure, I can appreciate that if someone took three years to complete a stunning oil painting of Henry VIII using his chamber pot, he or she should get credit for the enormous amount of work. But what makes that painting more valid than a sculpture made from chewing gum that I found under my desk? Don’t worry - I’ve never made such a thing. I hate sculpting.
I know that the price of a hand-knit item is usually directly related to the amount of hours it took to knit, and the type of yarn used. And I suppose that a piece of art’s medium and man-hours should have some bearing on its monetary value.
But its aesthetic value? Isn’t that something to be left to the beholder? Is Brooklyn Tweed’s Scholar Collar somehow a lesser kind of knitting because it’s garter stitch and not fancy cable work?
I don’t think so. I am definitely a to-each-his-own kind of person when it comes
to art. Or knitting. Or music for that matter, and I definitely have strong opinions about what I think is or isn’t music. But that’s just it - they’re my opinions.
I worry that a new knitter will give up the craft because he or she doesn’t think the completed projects are “good enough.” As far as I’m concerned, if it keeps you warm and makes you happy then it’s perfect just the way it is.
I sounded like Mr. Rogers just then, didn’t I.
AND SPEAKING OF BEER-HOLDERS...
I clicked on this link several days ago, and found myself giggling all alone in my house. My dogs definitely think I’m nuts, but then - they’re probably right.
Cheers!
the knit mongrel
Saturday, February 24, 2007