From Cocoon to Butterfly
 
 
Like the morning rise at another persons apartment, looking for your pants\panties and trying to figure out the high tech coffee maker so you can have some semblance of perspective in order to cope with the morning afters’ conversation upon their waking. But of course you are only fluent with getting to the point of 10 minutes ago before you exited the bathroom. As you fumble through the cupboards looking for the filters, because you have pretty good idea that it must take filters to work at all. All the while your hearing is more acute than a mother with 5 boys. You know where the water is (check), but do you know where the kitchen is (?), let alone the door to freedom. You would bolt, but you aren’t sure where you’re at, and how far you have come for last nights bounty of beauty or how you even got there. The foggy memory is too faint to make out and too painful to keep trying to remember it. The only message in your mind is “coffee! damn it”. Part of your efforts at this point are to create things to talk about, like how nice their coffee maker is and the cute comics are hung on the icebox, etc... and the other is to be awake enough to try and recall their name. A haaa! the kitchen -check- coffee. coffee, coffee (search mode kicks in) now you spy the freezer door, because everybody knows that this is where you keep the coffee.. and Voila! strike one,, their pet makes a noise in the room down the hall, not them, surly they have a cat or dog or bird they showed to you earlier that night, you pause to listen an extra moment to be sure they haven’t awakened too. Check- as you rescan the kitchen for the maker, the sink, the possibility of which item on the counter my have your golden ticket to coolness, your memory starts to kick in and bits and pieces of the night come in and out of consciousness. The Maker is there, cool cool cool, bottled water on the floor still not put away, killer, sugar, cream? how do they like it? Water in the machine, the sound of the wind outside, a smile in your thoughts as you get closer to the liquid elixir of life. The lights are all off , the sun isn’t out yet but its getting a little lighter outside, “its a cat for sure, as you recall your hay fever, and out of the darkness you almost step on it’s neck for it has come right in to your path to the cupboard where there nobody keeps the coffee, Rrrrrrrah it half screams, as you dive to the counter to avoid crushing the life out of it. How close was that, the pause again for outside noised from the bedroom, listening for the flush of the toilet, or the creak of the door, the shower, anything to keep you from continuing your quest to be the smooth operator and having the coffee ready, and being good in bed. Nothing.... silence, pheww, Water in machine, filter ready, COFFEE?? Her name rhymes with something... she’s got a cat, the roommate is out for weekend, where did she say the coffee was?.. Fridge again, last time because of the light, all the sneaking and quietness of a mouse, in the back behind dinner the cafe. Ok, an industrial style maker... a BUNN.. you know which one I mean, but at that moment you’ve never seen one outside the diner’s. Operate it! lol shit shit shit,, cat on the counter musing for attention, the kind you got just hours ago from a human, and if the cat could tell you how to make the coffee you would feed it. No time to run out to get it, but you had considered it, keys, car, not yours, and of course where am I anyway. So you give it go, how hard can it be, coffee grinder??? fuck! ......blender? too loud, grinder, grinder , grinder,,, ah yes grinder on the counter, suppress noise.... pillow, roommates pillow, perfect. Darla, Carla,... no no its two names for one.... cups?spoons?. Thinking the whole time how much noise will this thing make anyway. Coffee in filter, water in carafe, open lid, pour, all the while thinking how clean the machine is, no water spots should have been your clue,, too much wine though, pasta was killer. Ok launch the machine. Ok, light on, warming up, good, good, good, Next breakfast! Nope too late the shower is on and its all over now........Thinking back I never had coffee that day! Does this sound familiar? Well if it does, then you my friend have just shared the same experience I have many times over. The morning after coffee episode is one never to forget. I did later find out how to make coffee on that machine, as it was brand new and that type takes two pots of water to work the first time. But the change I am referring to, is the moment you realize that your whole gigolo\loose lifestyle is about to change when you can’t even make coffee anymore at their house. You shift into a relationship instead of a one night stand. When you are getting a lesson about the coffee maker 24 hrs later, because as you heard the shower come on your lust kicked in and then WHAP, you’re no longer in your little cocoon. You wake up 2 or 3 years later wiser and free to do as your please, you recall the name of the most awesome coffee maker ever, so you can remember to get one of your own so you too can be on the other end of that scenario one day. Because if you had known how to make coffee that one day, you’d still be in your cocoon, instead of spreading your wings. Oh the people we meet and things we learn, how they add to our character and we become more and more complex, hopefully because of it. What happen to that butterfly is purely based on what it was taught during those first moments of flight. I see now that I was totally engrossed in learning and more in tune with everything around me at the time, and not concerned with the shock and awe of the whole experience that comes along with being together with someone. A far cry from the first. So what will one do with this information, well it’s up to each ones’ own ambition. I say let the wind blow you around for a while and when you feel like you need another lesson, then go out and land on another flower. The world is full of flowers.
 
In the wake of change!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009