I love winning pointless competitions
 
One of the true joys of being a man is competing. We don’t need to compete over things that matter - but we do have to compete at all times.
 
Paul recently got better off-roading tyres than me.
 
This started an arms race that will end god-knows where.
 
All that is important is that I went out and spent more money on even bigger tyres than he did, and now I have bragging rights.
 
He may have a better job, a stable home life, a home, and a whole bunch of other things.
 
But I have better tyres, so he is gay.
Meats
Monday, 11 December 2006