What really matters- Emotional Connections to Visitors- Most toddlers will develop a fondness to playdates or visitors so that on departure, there will be a heartfelt goodbye.  We should encourage these warm goodbyes with our toddlers friends and visitors as this validates their feelings towards others.  (See Quarterly write-up for full description of “Empathy & Heart Qualities”)

How to put it into practice-

My Experience-

At this age, Whitney seemed to really have a special attraction to other babies. Her cousin Claire was only 8 months old but Whitney would like to play with the baby almost like she plays with her toy dolls. Upon departure of our guests, Whitney really zeroed in on saying goodbye to the baby and blowing her a kiss (see Goodbye Baby video)

Tuning In-

Whitney seemed to form special affections for the little baby. Not certain if it was because she is usually the littlest and thought it was great to be bigger than at least someone and felt a certain power in that relationship or if the baby pulled on her affections for other reasons. However, we could definitely tune into the fact that Whitney was feeling something special for baby claire. As of all the people who were leaving in the car, Whitney only acknowledged the baby and gave it her kisses and waves.

Extending/Bridging-

Once again at the time, I was not really tuning into Whitney’s special feelings toward baby claire. Although we certainly acknowledged and supported her kisses and goodbye waves, we could have extended her reflection on these feelings. After baby claire drove off, we could have helped Whitny recall all the fun things she did with baby claire and how good that made her feel. Recounting the events and explicitly recounting the feelings associated with those experiences helps our toddlers become more aware of those warm feelings and encourages them.