What really matters- Theory of Mind- Using Social information. Whit seemed to be growing in leaps in bounds on her ability to read me and was able to act on that social information. Her earlier emotional check-ins were now like theories about my thoughts. While infants as young as 10 months are good consumers of social information, they are not as proactive in their seeking as older children and that a fuller appreciation of social information does not evolve until later. Yet this critical skill of being able to read others is rapidly budding around now.

How to put it into practice-

In order to make it easier for Whit to use me as a social reference, one thing I did was to try to avoid saying “NO” all the time as she got into things around the house.  Instead of “no” (which you may find yourself doing to a newly toddling baby), I made the effort to rearrange the environment so that I could allow Whit to explore more freely.  I provided some rotating toys or pots and pans in an unlocked kitchen cabinet.  When I had to stop Whit’s activity, I tried to do so in a positive way (for example, heres a book for you to look at, this glass might break and it is not safe for you) and reserve my nos for things that are extremely dangerous (going towards an uncovered electrical outlet with a screwdriver, for example).  In this way Whit was learning quickly that when you say no you mean it.  Any word that gets overused loses its meaning. By controlling the emotional expression in my voice, I could have an effect on Whit.  I reserved the nos with genuine fear in my voice for extremely hazardous situations. That left me with lots of different expressions of curiosity, enthusiasm and positive emotions and references to share as Whit explored her world.

Discovering & developing Whit’s story-