things that go “bump” in the night
so there i was, lying in bed at 3 something a.m. (i’m not sure precisely what time it was because who’s paying attention to the exact time in the third hour of the day?) when i heard something go “bump” in the night.
it had the distinct sound of a child falling out of bed. not quite the distinct sound of a child falling out of the top bunk of a bunk bed -- although i can’t say exactly about that since so far (knock on wood) we haven’t actually heard that sound -- but it sounded like someone possibly fell out of a bottom bed.
and yet said “bump in the night” was not followed by the sound of crying, so i thought maybe it was the 3 something a.m. thing playing a trick on my head and my ears. i mean, let’s face it. who has a full grasp on the things captured by one’s senses at 3 something a.m.? i would know, after all, since i have the privilege of hanging out awake (at least partially!) at that particular time a few mornings a week.
but all the same, the mom part of my brain engaged to move my weary bones out of the bed again only moments after those weary bones got into the bed following my morning visit to grant’s room for his way-too-early breakfast. but i thought that i should, at the very least, investigate.
so into the hall i went to discover the source of the “bump in the night.”
i did not have far to go.
there, sitting on the floor outside the bathroom in her pink princess gown was my little hambone. she was just sitting there staring at the floor, silent. no tears. no angst. just a little pink blob in the darkness.
but what’s that?
more pink blobs on the floor in front of her...
and an odd odor emanating from her general direction...
an oddly familiar odor...
i’ve smelled that before...
then mom brain engaged again and from the deep recesses of my gray matter, it came to me.
it’s the sweet, lovely odor of partially digested hot dogs.
yum.
poor hammy was covered in barf, sitting in barf, and... oh yes! oh joy! her bed and linens were too! (but not the floor and carpet in between the bed and the current position of emily, thankfully!)
my sweet baby was just sitting there quietly considering her situation in the dark hallway alone, not sure of what to do with herself. it was quite a pitiful scene.
but as soon as we -- i woke scott for help of course! no need to tackle such heinous tasks alone! -- took off her gown and cleaned up the floor, she was totally fine and dandy. big smiles and even a few giggles and laughs as she pointed to the ick on the floor that mommy was cleaning up!
that’s my hambone. quite a little charmer, she is. not upset by the yack in her bed, the yack on her sheets, the yack on her gown, the yack in her hair, or the yack on the floor.
nope she was amused by it instead!
it was a pitiful sight. but a cute one as well. (if a barf-covered child can be cute, that is... in this case, she can be!)
and so the obligatory trip down the stairs holding all the aforementioned yack-covered cloth items to rinse them off in the sink before washing them in the washer. no time to waste! that horrid scent must be removed from the premises with haste or mommy might be following suit with the yacking simply from smelling it! after all, there is nothing quite like partially digested partially hydrogenated mechanically separated meat-ish products.
and so the carows have yet another reason not to eat hot dogs. we had already nearly ceased our consumption of that particular delicacy after scott experienced a similar -- shall we say “revisiting”? -- of his hot dog dinner a couple of times. it seems hot dogs do not agree with him internally. and once a person yacks a particular item a couple of times, it ceases to call to them any longer.
now that i’ve smelled that smell yet again, i think hot dogs have ceased to call to me as well!
and so, here at 3:47 a.m., i sign off and head back up to bed with the yacky items safely spinning round and round in the washer... sadly, the smell still lingers atop the stairs... but i’m too pooped to figure out how to rid us of that... gotta save some fun for tomorrow! :)
ahhhh, isn’t mommyhood glamorous? you’re jealous, i know.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
