I don’t think anyone of any race, religion or background can or would argue the fact that something has gone wrong in our world. The fact that people are killing each other, the fact that there are millions of kids dying daily in 3rd world countries when there are undoubtedly the resources in our grasp to fix what kills them. While there are beautiful things that we do experience....there is just no question that something is off.

 

I think what is more convincing then all of the external darkness has to be the darkness and selfishness in our own hearts. If we are still and quite for just moments.....and if we stop comparing our selves to others.....and if we just reflect on who we are....I know that the facades of “I am all right and I am self sufficient” will come crashing down. Dude, we have problems, and if we are the problem then how on Earth can we expect that we can fix ourselves....and if we don’t think we have problems....well then our problem is pride and sooner or later....it will expose you and I.

 

You know where this is headed....we need a third party...we need an advocate...we need a savior...we need the perfect son of God that died for us.

 

But even for those that accept Christ....I have observed so many of us are still walking in bondage to the same things that He has come to free us from. I.E. The pastor that knows and believes with all his heart that Jesus is the son, the way, the light....but He still is dominated day in and day out by lust and pornography and the fear of being exposed.

 

I am learning more and more that “absolute transparency” is the only freeing way to live. The only way to be freed from the darkness inside of us is to live in such away that we don’t hide it but we fully expose it. To be fully known is the only way that we can fully live. And the unchecked sin in our lives will eventually catch up to us and expose us anyway....so deal with it now.

 

But we are so worried about what other people are going to think about us that we will keep it inside....as if there is nothing in them that they can relate with.... If they are truly loving, they will support, encourage and walk with us in our struggles....and if they are not.....well then we have nothing to fear either because who can judge other than the one that judges all.....if you want to judge me fine....that is going to be your problem to deal with....I still choose to be free and transparent.

 

I recently walked through a tough stretch....and transparency was ultimately, what brought me out of it but it was also what let me endure it will I was in it....I had some sin in my life that I couldn’t even see....so it was not the scenario of “this is what I am hiding and this is what I need to confess”...it was more like “I know there is something off here and I don’t even know what it is, but this is what I am thinking and feeling, what do you think?” and through that...the Lord was able to use my closest friends to help point out to me what I was doing wrong. It was not easy....it hurt....and I did not enjoy it at all....but in the end I am thankful for it because if I had not been made aware of my sin....who knows how long I would have walked in it before I started dealing with it. And today it is still present but at least I am aware now and I can begin to do the things that the Lord has placed on my heart, in order to deal with it.

 

I am so thankful for my brothers in Christ. I am learning each day how much I need them. Without them I don’t have anyone to be transparent to. I have the best friends that I could ever ask for. Friends that are willing to listen without judging. Friends that are loving enough to call me out on my own junk when I don’t see it....but will do so in a loving way. Friends that are transparent with me and that don’t pretend to be “fine” when they aren’t. I don’t deserve them but I am glad that God has placed them in my life. They are my best shot at living free, because the Lord speaks through them to me, and He allows me to give myself for them....which I gladly do when I am not being selfish.

 

So today, in someways I am just getting over a tough stretch of life but at the same time I am just beginning the healing process of something that I know I have  been doing my whole life.....namely “control” and “not trusting God”. My personality is one that I want to know exactly what tomorrow looks like for me and I will spend all my energy today trying to control what my future holds....but I got kicked in the face by Jesus when He reminded me that He alone controls my life....and thank God for that fact....because if it were up to me....I am pretty sure I would lead myself off a cliff...

 

So today is a good day my friends as I am reminded once again that I am not perfect nor will I ever be....but He is and in Him I am justified....and the community surrounding me reminds me of that. God is good.