Holy crap, babies grow fast. In the past two months (no one said "web log" needs to be "frequent", though there's no good short form for "journal for the super lazy") he has learned how to roll both ways, sit up on his own, and he’s grown two teeth! He’s also made a new friend, and for the sake of propriety, we’ll just refer to him as “Mr. Penis”.

Up on the other end of his body, Theo must now face the challenge of eating solid food. It’s taken him a little while to get used to swallowing without sucking on something, and we endured a few weeks of having to feed him a spoonful of oatmeal and watch while he stuck his thumb in his mouth to suck it down. He’s a pro now, and enjoys pureed peas, carrots, sweet potatoes, and this disgusting liquid chicken that only looks fit for prisons or a sci-fi slave world of some sort.

These past two months have also ushered in a new era of baby/dog respect. While Maddie continues to ignore Theo unless he’s crying (in which case she goes into his room to check on him—handy for us, eh?), Gerda and Theo have become pals.

Anyone who knows Gerda knows that she’s the Miss Piggy of dogs, completely self-absorbed. Her beliefs are simple: pay attention to her, pet her, pet her more. For her to suddenly enjoy Theo’s company means only one thing—there’s something in it for her. Indeed, as soon as he started spitting up yummy milk and solid food, she became his personal groomer. Theo loves the slobber, and it has certainly brought them closer together.

In a little known passage in one of the lesser read footnotes, The Academy of Pediatrics baby-raising manual states, “Children are never too young to be tricked.” Following this advice, we have begun a regular regimen of deception and lies:

1) Last week we took him to the dog park so that Maddie and Gerda could get a little exercise; we told him it was the zoo (hey, he has no idea that there are other animals in the world besides dogs, right?).

2) Yesterday we covered his bedroom windows with black poster board so that he won’t know when the sun comes up. Evil? Perhaps. But do you know what time the sun rises? No, you say? That’s because it’s way too early. We’re trying to train him to sleep until 7:00 a.m., and no method is more effective than physically blocking out the sun.  It gave us over 40 minutes of additional sleep yesterday morning and if that's not worth playing God, we don't know what is.

Our family photos have moved since Yahoo photos closed its site. You can find all our photos at zirbaks.shutterfly.com. Enjoy.