Joel I. Zakow
 
“ I was an early walker, an early talker, “a real genius”, my grandmother would always say to her shtetl friends of the neighborhood as she swept the slate sidewalks in front of 548 Sackman Street. ” -Joel I. Zakow, For Two Dianas Joel I. Zakow July 8, 1941 Brooklyn, NY - March 29, 2006 NYC, NY Joel had come a far way since Sackman Street, yet he always revisited it in his mind, heart, and writing. One can never relinquish ties so strong. Please take a moment to share stories and memories of how our father and husband has touched your life. May these ties make us all stronger. “ I told her from an experienced point of view that there is order in the universe and that in the summation, everything will be equal. If one loses twenty dollars it will be found five dollars at a time. Everything will add up to zero; everything will balance. ” -Joel I. Zakow, For Two Dianas To share your memories, anecdotes & photos, please email us at: zakowart@gmail.com Memories ___________________________________ We met Joel and Teresa in Silverthorne last year at Rebekah Whitfield and Kevin Mills' wedding.  We had the distinct pleasure of visiting with them on the deck of the cabin overlooking Lake Dillon.  Joel told stories (oh what stories) and talked about his art - his passion was so evident. We are truly saddened to hear of his passing.  Our deepest sympathies go out to Teresa and his children. -Thom Hanson and Kevin Peterson He was my business father and mentor. I have never met anyone who enjoyed life more. He taught me to be careful and honest. The art world is not filled with honest people, so Joel was a rarity. He walked as a genuine soul who loved only one thing more than his work: his family and especially his wife Teresa. I miss him and I always will. I love you Joel. - Mykal Kasyth I met Teresa previously in Denver, and met Joel when Rebekah and I were in Vail in Dec 2005.  The four of us had dinner one evening in Vail, and Joel was so gracious to me, although he had never met me before. We discussed our fractured fibulas, and I was astonished that he was skiing, while I was still very cautious about walking on the snow.  Again, Rebekah and I were working in Vail in March, when she heard of his hospitalization, and we were saddened.  My thoughts and prayers are with you all. - Esther Caldara I had heard of  Rebekah's friends, "Joel and Teresa" so many times until it was my great fortune to meet them and  to go on my first visit to London with them and Rebekah.   What a wonderful time to be with two people so full of life!  What a marvelous guide in the museums!  My only regret is that we could not have stayed longer.   Teresa, I  understand losing a husband. Life will seem empty, but oh, the memories go on forever.   A few words for you from your Southern friend ........"Bless your heart...."     - Lou Lyons To the whole Zakow family.... Thinking of you all during this difficult time.  Please know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers. With much Love, - Bridget Barry Taking the "R" train to Joel’s studio.   It started out as routine, so many years ago, and as time rolled on it became a way of life. Your extraordinary skill, integrity, honesty and sense of humor was always a pleasant anticipation to look forward in taking the ride downtown. You have been always there ready to give a helping hand and valuable advise for the trade we love so much. Although the mighty Lord had His plans worked out, your departing came too swift, too soon, but now, He has opened the gate of Heaven to welcome your good soul.   Now, the next "R" train will not be the same. But the legacy will live on through your beloved family...And so will the memories...   So long dear friend. Ciao "Bambino" ...  - Carlo Dear Dad, All your books will be ready soon. They’re on disk and ready to go. I’ll bring them by the house and you can read them to me and when your eyes fail you - I’ll read to you eternally. Love, - Diana Dear Cousin Joel, We will miss you dearly. I will miss my cousin the “art restorer who lived in SoHo”. How special to have known him! The great Alchemist. Love, - Cousin Robert Dear Cousin Joel, To all the Sundays at Aunt Mary’s house ... - Ilene Sirota He was a good grampa. I liked fishing with him. Love, - Austin, I loved him Grandpa Joel Some of my favorite memories of Joel: ...the need to return to the ski shop everyday to have his new "custom" boots fitted in Lech, Austria ...skiing in a whiteout in St. Moritz - Teresa, do you remember the 3 hour lunch at the lake? ...setting off the security alarms in museums wanting to show me a detail of a painting ...of course Pepi's in Vail and Apre` ski at Montauk ...touring the wine country on Long Island ...getting off the elevator in SoHo and seeing Joel drawing I could go on and on, but the best was having Teresa and Joel come to our wedding!  - Rebekah I cannot believe Joel is gone! I still believe he is “ joking us ”! I cannot forget his intelligent remarks, humor and jokes when me, Linda and Teresa were spending time together dining or skiing or movie going. - Andrei Carascas Joel, our friend, you left too soon, but your wit, your mordant remarks, your charming sarcasm will stay with us. We will miss you forever, - Linda We are so sorry for the loss of Joel. We are very sad to learn of his passing. Angelo and I have fond memories of skiing with him in France and the many wonderful evenings we passed together at dinner there. Please accept our deepest sympathy. Love, - Tina and Angelo We’ve known Joel and Teresa through Andrei and Jessica. We are glad to have spent some time together with them.  We had been keeping a close watch over Joel’s condition since his stroke, through Jessica, and like everyone, we were starting to feel a little more hopeful about his future as the days wore on. We were shocked and deeply saddened when Jessica told us about his passing. Our hearts go out to Andrei, Teresa, Diana and the other family members.  We know that Joel had many artistic talents, but unlike most artists, Joel actually made a good living from his art restoration business – remarkable and something that should be broadcast across all college art departments in the City. And perhaps most importantly, he was also a fly fisherman, which made him – and Andrei – especially admirable to us.  Joel and Teresa graciously invited Jessica and I (Sharon) to their lovely home in Niantic, CT. We had a wonderful dinner and enjoyed the fabulous view of the shore from their patio. We had good food, wine and great company….they really knew how to enjoy life.  Last Labor Day weekend we hosted a Clambake with about 70 people. Joel and Teresa came to our place in Connecticut. Even though they didn’t know many of the folks, they mingled right in – after all, Joel had an audience. And Teresa brought incredibly delicious stuffed, multi-colored peppers which we still talk about today. At a central table in the yard we had set up a clam bar. People would go up to the clam bar and help themselves to those raw clams on-the-half shell – that is, if they could pry open those tight-lipped creatures.   Evidently Joel picked up one of the clam knives and tried to pry open some clams …without success. Few things are as frustrating and hard on your hands as trying to stick a knife into a rock-hard clam shell. So being resourceful and savvy, he put down the knife, and joked around until he persuaded a more successful fellow clam-opener to pry open a few for him, which he enjoyed. Later, Teresa wrote in her thank-you card to us that Joel had pledged to practice clam opening so that at next year’s Clambake, he would be ready to do it himself, and maybe even for some others.  At our next Labor Day’s Clambake we will miss Joel, with his joking grin, so we’ll set out a bowl of clams, and a knife for him to open them in spirit, and we’ll also set aside a few already-opened clams, in case he still needs a little help from his friends. He’s had many. 
  Love,  - Sharon & Mo Though I only experienced a handful of brief encounters with my cousin Joel, his intense thoughtful soul has left a strong impression on my heart, which remains vivid and quietly felt.   I wish to extend all my emotional support and love to his family members in this time of mourning. With love, - Cousin Adam Shechter I was in high school when I first met Joel and I remember to this day the image of him sitting in front of his easel with a cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth. As we entered the apartment, Joel lovingly barked at Diana to go to the store and she responded with something witty and entirely adolescent and I quickly fell in love with the Zakow family. I wandered shyly over to see what he was working on and was amazed at his delicate touch as he penciled in the fine details of a woman's body. I will always smile when I think of Joel saying "Suzi from Cincinnati" with his thick Brooklyn accent. Joel - may you continue to shine. - Suzi Piker When I met Joel and his wife and partner Teresa, I knew Our Father sent us a blessing. And if I paid attention, he had a lifetime of experiences to share. Joel did not have to boast about his talent, it spoke for itself. Joel was never pretentious; he was comfortable, confident and extremely talented. And although he never bragged, we learned also that he was an artist in his own right. Joel will be missed by so many lives that he touched and for so many reasons. Joel, I will never forget your words of encouragement, your stories and your sense of humor. How genuinely excited you became when we brought you something exceptional and how you gently steered us away, when it was not. You told Mykal someday you wonder why you bought that piece of *#!@! & that day came. How when you spoke of Teresa and anything she experienced, it was if you were experiencing it as well. How you told us what it takes to become an expert -- read a lot of books, look at a lot of paintings, and write a book yourself. No pretense, no magic names or magic formulas required. How you shared with us that some paintings by the most valuable artists really are not that good, as we sometimes believed, but only their names brought value. How you continued to encourage Mykal, who had ventured in an area that he always had an interest, but only recently had the resources. Not only were you considered a great businessman, but more important a friend. Thank you Joel for those life lessons, as brief as they may have been.   Joel, just like in art in life you were able to turn a dandelion into a rose. Love, - Mykl I want again to extend my deepest feelings of sadness, and loss.  I did not know the Joel, who filled your life with so much love, and caring.  I did not know the Joel, who was a Father to four children. I always respected his space, admired his professional career, and marveled at his ability and talent.   I have some more photos of the young Joel, who always seems to look right at the camera with the sweetest of smiles and a twinkle in his eyes.   Thank you so much for opening your home to us and allowing us to tell the unending stories of anger, hurt, survival, and most important humor, so necessary in the face of tragedy! His Mother, my Aunt was always so nice to me, and sad that she could not help herself.  She had a wonderful sense of humor and could laugh at herself [unlike her brothers and sisters].  She was almost deaf and I would start speaking a sentence and stop speaking for a moment and start again, and she would hit her hearing aid, thinking it was the problem and then realize I was joking with her and we would laugh together.   She still dressed well and looked good in those rare moments of sanity. She would come to our home to just visit.  Finding my Dad, her brother on the couch [that's where he lived for many years], and she would harangue him to get up, clean himself, and dress.  We would laugh-here was a woman, institutionalized in a psychiatric hospital telling my father to shape up. I want to repeat that Joel was very unique.  Like his predecessors, the alchemists of the Middle Ages , who dabbled in the mysteries of life, he too dabbled in uncovering these secrets, by mixing chemical together and blowing up basements, experimenting in the magic of image making, by using paint and pencil.   When he asked me to model for him, it made me feel important as a very young adolescent, in this chaotic environment, where Joel sought comfort and security.   The few times he asked me to attend a movie in the neighborhood with him was just plain nice, like a big brother would do [eating greasy egg rolls on the way home].   I will not make him into a saint, but I can say in all honesty, that I never saw him lose his temper, or treat anybody in a nasty way.   Joel was Joel and that was the way I treated him.  I respected his privacy and always enjoyed our short visits, a few pool games, and a couple of laughs, and of course a moderate priced meal around the corner.   That night, when my newborn son, Michael had a medical problem and we found ourselves in Soho, I happened to run into Joel and told him what was wrong.  He was so compassionate.  When he called the next day with the name of a Doctor who could help us, I was so appreciative and thanked him.  The problem was remedied that night.  I can still feel the pain he felt when he finally found out that my Mom had passed away and telling me that he was sorry he did not attend the funeral.  I know he loved my Mother so dearly.   I am so sorry that we can not, in our old age, tell stories to each other about that very caring and giving woman.   As I said to you before; I'm sorry I did not come to the hospital to say goodbye.  I would have thought by now that I would have learn that old lesson in life, "that time waits for no man" and I thought I had time to visit Joel and say  "goodbye, and tell him how much I thought of him". Much love, - Cousin Robert I met Joel when I was a kid going to school with Diana and Andrei.  He joked with us kids in the same manner he joked with adults, which scared off a lot of the boys at the time who were calling for Diana.  But he never scared me.  He was brutally honest and said things with that glint in his eye that made you want to tell him your secrets.  And then he would laugh.  The Zakows were and are the way I hope for my family to be.  They're their own team.   They have more love for each other than any other family I've known.  Teresa, Di, Andrei, I love you guys.  And I loved Joel.  My best memories were shared with you. -Jennifer Bain Dear Joel:  We were not prepared for your abrupt departure for "the other side" as we had a list of subjects for this summer's discussion and your valued opinion was needed, however, since the decision had been made and taken out of our hands, we need to say a few words until we meet again. We will miss your company watching the fireworks from the deck along with the celebration of your birthday. We will miss not hearing excerpts from your book  read by the author himself. We will never forget the joyous expression on your face when the truck load of rocks that we had gifted you as a house warming  ---  were dumped on your lawn in exactly the design you had hoped for. The community of restaurant servers will miss the artful rejection of your tuna dinners as being too rare or too well done. We loved your enthusiasm for your fish pond, grapevines imported secretly from the Hamptons and the bringing home "the catch." The Pussy-Kat population will be ever grateful for your perfectionist renditions of their charms. The delightful dinners at your house and ours --- your presence will remain.  Darling Teresa's superb cooking and your artful grilling were truly a masterpiece. We love knowing you, Teresa, Diana and Andrei. -Miss Lucy and Dr. Jules   Dear Family and Friends of Joel, I wish to extend my sympathy to you all. I was shocked to hear about Joel. I have been a fan of his drawings for many years. I am an Elected Artist from the Lyme Art Association in Old Lyme, CT. since 1997. I did not know Joel really well but spoke to him on occasion and I'm sure I speak for the LAA artists in saying he will be missed. Artists are special people. I am glad to have so many of them as friends. - Sincerely, Judy Chapman Dear Andrei:   Thank you so much for sending me the obituary.  Both you and Diana as well as your Mother and Father are close to our hearts.  When your family is far away, your friends become your family, and that is how it is with us.  We shall miss your Father's presence amongst us.  We shall never forget him or the many times spent together.  The Passovers at your house, will always be treasured memories.  The thousands of  memories woven over the years, shall all survive, like the pictures drawn by him that hang on our walls.  - We love you, Anita Joel Zakow  I only knew the Joel of Giants Neck Beach.  And then only for a relatively short fifteen years.  He was one of the most complete people I have ever met.      I will miss Joel driving up with his rear bumper dragging.  To Joel’s amazement we were able to bend it back up an bolt it.  To my amazement he had driven up from New York that way.    I will miss the Joel who left his car unlocked so the thieves would not break the glass.  I will miss the look of shock as I reached up to “feel” the peaches in a painting by an old world master hanging in the dining room.  I will miss stories told by the author himself.   I will miss the previews of the sketches and paintings by the artist himself.    I will miss sitting on the stool in the kitchen just talking with Joel while Teresa made something I knew would be delicious.  I will miss the Joel who had friends from every generation and seemingly every walk of life.  I will miss helping Joel solve the water problem in Teresa’s hot tub.  I will miss putting up new ropes at the dock for Joel.  I will miss the Joel who could go out fishing, catch absolutely nothing and still have a good time.  Joel was a very fortunate man to have Teresa as a partner in life.  Few people are blessed with such a strong and sure relationship.  You have succeeded in raising two very fine adults.  To your credit, Andrei and Diana have already experienced more in life than most people ever will.  Things will not be the same with out you, but Teresa, Diana and Andrei will continue many of the traditions as they have become a way of life.  They share your love of Giants Neck.  Few outsiders can appreciate that no mater where we go or where we live, GNB will always be our home.   The 4th of July parties will continue.  Watching sunsets from the deck will continue.  Fishing will continue.  The friendships will continue.  The restoration business will continue.  They will be different and in some ways incomplete without you, but they will continue because you taught each of us something about life.  You taught us how to live and how to love life itself.    Joel we will miss you, but inside each of us is a part of you that will live on as a tribute to a humble and gracious, but truly great man.  Joel, until we meet again.  - Richard, Denise, Jonas and Oliver mailto:zakowart@gmail.comhttp://us.f328.mail.yahoo.com/ym/Compose?To=*#!@!shapeimage_2_link_0shapeimage_2_link_1